Kamau is attracted to a woman named Diana. He asks her out to a movie; she accepts; they have a pretty good time. A few nights later he asks her out to dinner, and again they enjoy themselves. They continue to see each other regularly, and after a while neither one of them is seeing anybody else.

And then, one evening when they’re driving home, a thought occurs to Diana, and, without really thinking, she says it aloud: “Do you realize that, as of tonight, we’ve been seeing each other for exactly six months?”

“Really!?” exclaims Kamau.

And then there is silence in the car. To Diana, it seems like a very loud silence. She thinks to herself: “I wonder if it bothers him that I said that. Maybe he thinks I’m trying to push him into some kind of obligation that he isn’t ready for, or isn’t sure of yet.”

And Kamau is thinking: “Gosh. Six months!”

And Diana is thinking: “But, hey, I’m not so sure what kind of relationship this is, either. Sometimes I wish I had a little more space, so I’d have time to think about whether I really want us to keep going the way we are, moving steadily toward . . . I mean, where are we going? Are we just going to keep seeing each other at this level of intimacy? Are we heading toward marriage? Toward children? Toward a lifetime together? Am I ready for that level of commitment? Do I really even know Kamau that well?”

And Kamau is thinking: . . . “so that means it was . . . let’s see . …February when we started going out, which was right after I had the car at the dealer’s, which means . . . let me check the odometer . . .Whoa! I am way overdue for an oil change here!” Continue Reading »

A man gets so agitated by the insolent behavior of other beings whom he considers to be his subjects and hence lesser beings, that in a fit of rage he bursts a blood vessel and dies. That, for those of you who are paupers of history is a true story, twice true actually.

A question pops up in my mind, what is the highest degree of anger that a person can be driven to? Another one follows suit, between men and women, which side  possesses a higher capacity for rage? What ticks a woman’s anger valves to palpitate at their most vigorous? How about a man’s?

A few weeks back I embarked on an odyssey that would culminate in women taking their proper place in this fiber that is the society we live in. That article sparked controversy in my wee bit of a fan base, with an ‘it-cant-be’ kind of admiration from the women and a ‘what-the-#@$&’ kind of reaction from the men. The men are of no concern to me as these articles are meant for the ladies. Given the reaction from the ladies, I felt obliged to write this equally sublime follow-up, so if you are a man, read on at your own peril. Continue Reading »