When we stare… A true story [Part 1]
February 26th, 2010 in Lawrence's Take, Relationships by Lawrence
If you had the option of choosing what precise moment you prefer to die, what would your choice be? Most of us would probably say just after going for confession. Let’s face it; none of us likes the idea of paying for our sins, right? Sins by definition are everything your mama and your pastor or priest have told you not to do, but which for some obscure reason appear infinitely more appealing than the good deeds. But what to do? It is what it is, right? Ok, enough of that.
One of the Sins I was repeatedly admonished against as I grew up was ‘Girls’. I’m serious. My list of the top ten sins to avoid had ‘Girls’ leading at first position by a colossal margin. Precisely put, I remember such assertions as ‘Achana na hawa wasichana’, ‘Wasichana watakuharibia maisha’, and my favourite one, frantically delivered just before I left for campus, ‘Ukiwaona, toka mbio!’.
It came as a complete surprise to me when my Paps raised this issue for the first time, during one of our scant-but-still-scary father-son bonding sessions. Turns out ‘Girls’ wasn’t a sin; and that’s how ‘Girls’ lost the singles quotes. “Girls are good”, he said. “But not now”, he concluded with finality. According to Paps, I had to finish my schooling first before I earned any rights to Girls. Girls would distract me from achieving his dream of fathering the first ‘A’ material in our village. Nothing was going to come between me and his social bragging rights, nothing!!
In the face of this maze of declarations regarding this mysterious opposite sex, who would blame me for being increasingly curious? Thus I began staring. Continue Reading »




I am Muslim (I love how that sounds so scary, BAM!), and never knew how funny muslim mothers could get. A few days ago, i was at a friends’ house,who had invited us, with another couple of families (yes, we do big like that) for dinner. There was my family, a French one, and another Pakistani one.
The season of giving is finally here! Well, at least for me. A time to sow what I shall hopefully reap before Christmas comes around. Boy, do I dread Valentine’s Day.
Do your bookshelves heave with self-help books or do you prefer the trial and error approach to love and relationships?
Kamau is attracted to a woman named Diana. He asks her out to a movie; she accepts; they have a pretty good time. A few nights later he asks her out to dinner, and again they enjoy themselves. They continue to see each other regularly, and after a while neither one of them is seeing anybody else.
I heard that quote on Isidingo, and it got me thinking. At the end of the day, despite feminism, liberalism, and all the other -isms, the average man still prefers to catch his own meat. Never mind that once they catch it, they take a bite, get bored, and look for new prey. As one man said on Nini’s show, “It’s like a dog chasing a cat. What does it do with it once it catches it?”
A phenomenon that I have always heard about recently came knocking at my door. I never used to believe the “rumors” that guys go to church to look for nice Christian girls to marry or date or whatever, well, that was until it happened to me.
Sometime back, Churchill King’ang’i and Maina wa Kageni were on about whether or not single women above thirty “kidu”-something- get miserably lonely and need to have a man. As usual I was listening to the first part of this twosome breakfast show, while in the bus on my way to work. King’ang’i was having a good time rubbishing all those single ladies calling in to claim their long and/or new found joyous loneliness, and Maina as usual was adding “kudos’” to those same sisters.
So Lady Love has been quiet for some time but guess what I must say that it is for the better. This is because it has been a time for me to read research and practice, practice, practice.
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