Author Archives: lawrence

Where were you when I was single? – Part 2

Where were you when I was single? – Part 2

Thursday, 27th June 2014. A dreary day that had been made even drearier by the thought of sitting in a boardroom for a whole friggin day as different vendors walked in to pitch their Customer Relationship Software solutions. Have you ever listened to a proper Indian with a proper Indian accent do a two hour presentation? I listened to four. That’s 8 hours of not understanding half the stuff the presenters were saying. Let’s just say, for now I have postponed any trips to India, indefinitely. I had reached that ‘shoot-me-now’ point when the last… Continue reading →

Where were you when I was Single? – Part 1

Where were you when I was Single? – Part 1

“Dude, didn’t that mama notice the ring on your finger?” “Wapi! Maybe she thought it was bling” “Bling on your wedding ring finger? Stop making up excuses for her Man” “What are you trying to say?” “I’m saying she wants you to give it to her like a Spartan!” “He he he, I’m a married Man” “Lawrence bana, what happened to you? Now I believe in Miracles kabisa!” “I don’t know. You really think that girl wanted me?” “Dude, she was all over you the whole night, took your number, introduced you to her friends,… Continue reading →

Fatherhood, Seriousness & Boredom – Part 2

Fatherhood, Seriousness & Boredom – Part 2

After what seemed like an eternity in hell, he spoke. He asked what my plan was, and I told him exactly what I knew he wanted to hear. He asked if I loved his daughter, I said I did one hundred percent. If I had thought facing Milkah’s Dad was the hardest part about all this, I was zombie dead wrong. That was just the beginning. I remember going to bed that night and thinking phewx! I made it through the Shark Tank. What an idiot I was! So let’s recap. I am 29, single… Continue reading →

Fatherhood, Seriousness & Boredom – Part 1

Fatherhood, Seriousness & Boredom – Part 1

Ahoy Sisters! I know, I know, who do I think I am to keep disappearing and appearing out of your lives like a road side magician? Don’t I know y’all got better things to do than wait around in vain for my next post? A Blogger gets 5 loyal readers and thinks he is Justin Beiber?? No wonder Kenyan bloggers will never go anywhere!! Nkt. But I digress. You will forgive me though. Much as I love writing about my ever adventurous life, sometimes my pen (or keyboard) gets overtaken by events. But I’m here… Continue reading →

6 signs your boyfriend/husband is gay

6 signs your boyfriend/husband is gay

Oh you should have seen her. This girl was distraught. As far as she was concerned, her life had just taken an unlikely turn! How, how could this happen to her? Her name was Mary, and for the life of me, I cannot remember how I ended up in her confidant list. Mary is (although she isn’t sure anymore) married to an amiable and intelligent bloke named Francis. They have been in this matrimonial state for 8 years now, yes, 8 years! Blessed with two kids, a playful and curious boy named Mark and a… Continue reading →

Of Bridesmaids and Wedding Dramas

Of Bridesmaids and Wedding Dramas

I never told you about Tim’s Wedding day. Tim, for those of you who have short memories happens to be my best friend, and the proud husband to a girl with who if he screwed up for even one second I would be first in line knocking on her door. Her name is Christine. It’s been just over 1 year now since the day they exchanged Vows at a solemn event in a 100 year old chapel at Nairobi’s Lavington area. A beautiful ceremony, yet simple and elegant like everything else Tim does. To my… Continue reading →

Bad Boy meets Church Girl – Part 4

Bad Boy meets Church Girl – Part 4

I stopped, sighed, looked at her and made a futile effort at offering a goofy smile. For one reason or the other, my heart beat faster than usual. I could swear my sweat pores were beginning to let loose and I felt hazy. This wasn’t good. “Fair enough. Let’s hear it Stella” “Alright. I was 18 at the time…” “How old are you now?” “I turn 23 in August” “Oh, ok.” “Having been brought up in a particularly staunch Christian background, Church was my life. We had just moved back into the City from North… Continue reading →

Bad Boy meets Church Girl – Part 3

Bad Boy meets Church Girl – Part 3

Now, where was I? Aah yes. 5th Sunday, and there I was all suited up and polished. To ensure this day went according to plan, I had forsaken Kamau’s since Thursday night. This was a first. My very dear Kamau actually called on Sunday morning to confirm that I was not sick in bed, or dead for that matter. I am yet to decipher whether Kamau honestly cares about me, or the healthy revenue I bring him. On this day of the Lord, Stella, whose name I had not gotten to know to this point,… Continue reading →

Bad Boy Meets Church Girl – Part 2

Bad Boy Meets Church Girl – Part 2

Fourth Sunday was a prowling Sunday. I have zero recollection of what the pastor shouted about on that day, and my wandering eye was met several times by frowns from other worshipers. Tim was helping with the search. Where was this girl? Then I felt it. At the recesses of my manscience I felt it. She was nearby, close enough for me to see her, probably even touch her, but man I just couldn’t find her! I nudged Tim and told him to look closer, much closer. Then I realized it. In my efforts at… Continue reading →

Bad Boy meets Church Girl – Part 1

Bad Boy meets Church Girl – Part 1

In the beginning there was God, who without a doubt was fully clothed in majestic robes and clouds to cover any sections the robes couldn’t. Why he decided that his human creations would roam the earth in bare nakedness I will never understand. Thanks to the so called Original Sin, you and I can now adorn the latest in fashion wear. I guess everything happens for a reason. Like I mentioned in my last post, I dared to rediscover the tenets of my spirituality which Ma had so ardently instilled into me. This was back… Continue reading →

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