Week after week I have sat and watched myself become what my mother feared I would become; a product of my own de-motivation. I exist but I do not live. The morning breeze is nothing but a state of weather and the wind through where I wish my long silky hair might have been is a figment of nature. Nothing powerful. Nothing worth jotting a few musical notes about. I watch my friends go through life. making the best of what they were granted and it hit me. Have I not learned? What have I achieved the past couple of months?
Then I thought to myself; that I should stop beating myself up. Indeed I have woken up to a sad and introverted routine that is not me, but I have the most inconspicuous yet most valuable lessons at hand throughout the months.
I have learnt that love is powerful. In a subtle but oh so violent force. It is beautiful but a beauty with such capacity to turn ugliest. Love is rare, but in such great amounts it is barely quantifiable. It is a ballad that turns any second to a dance song. It is pure but so tainted with our human nature and that purifies it even more. Love is an oxymoron.
I have learnt that forgiveness is as freeing as it is the best form of revenge. That friendship is the quiet peace amidst a loud and rowdy company of acquaintances. It is the amnesia inducing drug that we crave every second so pursued by thought of our troubles. It is the genuine laughter amidst chaotic sobs. Friendship is that rare gem as costly as it requires virtue in a world eroded by vice.
I have learnt that we are limited only by ourselves and fear. That we have nothing to lose by trying except respect for ourselves.
Am I the wisest person that ever lived? No! But I intend to pray for the same every day. Because right and wrong are real and they define our next move more than we can imagine. Our attitude shapes our future and I intend to put on the best hat for every occasion.
So there, scrape for something good every second and you will find smiling is not as strenuous as they make it seem.
Photo credit: marceloto
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Living is a risk, as you stand to lose your life. Chasing dreams is deemed a waste, we chase money instead. But why preserve time you have no control over? So I chase my dreams praying time’s end finds me risk fully happy. Find more on her blog kimarinyokabi.blogspot.com