Ask Lily: Did he play me?

Ask Lily is a column on The Lily Review where users can post questions or dilemmas they may be going through and other members of the community can respond with possible solutions. Click here to send in your question. Share you solutions or thoughts in the comments.

Hi lily, am in a dilemma here.

I met this guy who was into me. At first I wasn’t into him because I was involved with another guy then. I got to find out through a common friend we share that he was into me. After meeting him we connected and found out that we like each other. He was still involved with an older woman who he claims he didn’t love but loved me. Things didn’t work out with my current boyfriend then and we got to separate.this guy was still in pursuit for me but I didn’t want to get involved because of his complicated situation.

We recently met and he told me that things dint work out between them and they had separated but i am still not sure. He has always said he loved me and been very persistent about it for years.since i also liked him I gave in and we hooked up. We got intimate the day we hooked up and after that he disappeared. I called him but he said he will call me, I wrote him an email but he never responded. I tend to think he just played with me but am not sure because he always talks to his friends about me and marriage.


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  • mumash

    what is the dilemma exactly ..the writing is in black and white i didnt see any grey areas.

  • Naomie

    Hi Mumbi, i guess now you know the guy simply wanted to sleep with you. Its over forget about him and move on, lose his number. Its hard, its painful but he’s a jerk.

  • Tamaku


    Forget the negative vibes; he’s just popped out to get the rings and sort out the venue, he’s down on airtime and his blackberry has run out of juice. He’ll be back shortly, honest….

  • Naomie

    @ Tamaku eeish talk about being harsh! lol

  • Yunia

    Mumbi, i think with the situation it has already shown you what happened. He dude played you and got what he wanted and left. It hurts but i think you need to take the bold step and move on…at this moment!!

  • Mia

    Yes he played you. Be sure to thank him some day by being truly happy. Why? Because he saved you a lifetime of hurt and because success is the best revenge. Don’t try to be happy. BE happy; grieve what he did and then CHOOSE to move FORWARD. You’ll be just fine :)

  • Mbũrũ Kamau

    He played you. You allowed to be used, and unfortunately, duped you.
    How well you want to know, in my view, if you get intimate with a man almost immediately after you meet him, wait for four things – pregnancy, there is a mrs. him, STI and dumping.

    The best revenge is just to let go and be yourself. Look for people who will value you, Mumbi.


  • Mwesh

    Mumbi,this is not brain surgery,in black and white,he din’t play you,he used you.Plain and simple.He came,he saw,he conquered and evacuated… footprints.Move on he was not even worth it.And next time don’t hop into the sheets with someone just because you have known him for years… yoself more

  • lyreb

    Mumbi, the thril was in the chase….you kept him intrigued so when he finally scored he moved on to the next one….You got played ..MOVE ON…PS dudes dont just keep saying I LOVE YOU like that ( and you had not even been dating eeeeish), infact ka haukuget hii clue…uko down tu sana…

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