Back on the block … again

So … a few milliseconds past the 35 year mark and I find myself back in the social experiment more popularly known as dating. Senora I won’t get into the Mexican style soap opera drama of how just yet but suffice to say he lied, he cheated and when all was said and done I won the kids and dogs.

menuNow I must be honest about this … I could take the knocks when I was younger, slimmer, blissfully ignorant and full of that youthful exuberance you pine for as they, the young bloods, drift by while you stuff your face at one of the lovely food courts in our malls.

My blind date number 1 was somewhat (significantly) younger than me. I had refused to be sucked into the pleas for a date and knew I’d crossed the line when I used the ‘courting’ word instead of ‘hanging out’. Branded difficult and unrealistic by my single, dateless, 35+ girlfriends they planned an intervention. Amidst tears, shrill screams, stiff drinks and ‘you go girl’ cheers I called him and we made plans to meet up for a drink. So ….I finally find the bar with the hip name and after a mind numbing two hours here are my three tips if you opt to walk the dating plank again.

Lesson # 1: Location, location, location
For the 35+ you’ve done your time and really do not have to slum it in the name of a date. Honestly there are simply too many one week wonder bars and clubs in this town. Names change every other week and your bound to get confused so by all means necessary make sure you have at least one in the know under 25 year old extremely social confidante who can give you a wikipedia style heads up at the touch of a phone pad . Confidante is there to make sure you have all the nitty gritty on every club, bar, motel and player – you are not Indiana Jones on some adventure so rely on those who have been there, done that and are still doing it!

Lesson # 2: Persistence
I’m sorry but persistent guys are like that crazy itch at the back of your throat when you’re developing an ENT infection. You can’t quite scratch it, extremely irritating and takes forever to get rid of. Persistent men are not as flattering as romance books make out. It feels more like being stalked. I should have ignored my precious, misguided girlfriends and spent the evening sipping a lovely glass of wine and reading a book – my original plan. It’s great to get back on the horse but ladies do so in your own time and on your own terms.

Lesson # 3: Can pay, won’t pay
diner receiptFor those from that era … remember that Clint Eastwood squint daring the bad guy to draw his gun and shoot? So our date draws to an end and the waiter places the bill in the middle of the table. We look at each other, glance at the bill and … pause. The ‘stare’ starts… he buckles, nervous cough, picks up his drink and looks in every direction but mine! Ten minutes later I pick up the bill, pay and make to leave. Cheeky brat jumps up to escort me to the car. I am firm believer that a man should pay the bill. I am emancipated enough to state loud and clear “I can pay, I won’t pay” … you asked me out, finish what you started.

So ….more power to you. Live it up, laugh it off and by all means necessary date, date, date.

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Each life is a personal journey no matter how public it may all seem at times! I'm still figuring it out and here I share my journey ...and what I'm discovering along the way.