A lot has been said about finding the ideal mate and yet many of my girlfriends including me, always complain about the men or man in our lives. So what kind of homosapien are we really looking to find or even better hoping to spend eternity with?
In the book Act like a lady, think like a man, Steve Harvey says that men look for a woman who will hold his hand tighter when usher passes by all sexy and sweaty with money dropping from his pockets and still say,”baby, You are the man!!” the same way we want a man who knows that he is all that and a bag of chips but is subtle in showing it. Yes a confident man will always get the vote even if he is good-looking from far or far from good looking. So we can all agree that confidence is a priority in our list.
IN CONTROL-BUT NOT A CONTROL FREAK
My life is not your remote control. Period. Control freaks, are just that freaks. As much as being a man makes you the head of the relationship, this does not mean that the lady beside you ceases to exist. I enjoy it when my man picks out what I should wear for our special day out, but can you imagine if he chose to pick out my entire wardrobe? I must say that there is a very thin line between being in control and being a control freak because overdoing an act simply tips you over to the weirdo side we do not want to date.
If you were able to know what you will be doing ten years from today or even what God has in store for you for the rest of your life, would there be any thrill about being alive? The same way I wouldn’t want to pick up my phone, with my well manicured finger on the receive button each and every hour knowing that you are going to call. Jamie Foxx sings about being unpredictable. Ladies, if your man is the opposite, please get him get him the song. I like when a man lets my mind wander as to what he is going to do next, even the next minute after hearing from him is a complete surprise. This not only keeps the flame burning but ensures that the excitement never dies.
Sweetheart, be as real as you can. You must first of all understand the kind of woman you are dating. This helps you know where you are. Ladies, you must also understand the kind of man you are dating, if he is broke kick his ass to the curb, if you know you are high maintenance. Otherwise you will have problems that only exist in Mexican telenovelas. My friend was telling me a story about how this guy took her out to a super expensive restaurant, and bought her a super delicious-burn-out-your-wallet-diner only for him to order a glass of water for himself!! She is wise never went out with his sorry-hungry self again. The little things make the biggest impact. A take out joint in the city center that smells of a concoction of oil and fried chicken can just turn out to be Zen Garden as long as you both know that is what works out for you.
A BAD BOY
This is not your mungiki type of man, but a man who wears the sign, I am a man baby!! This is the kind of guy who will tell me my ass looks super fine in my work uniform, or send me a text saying what he would like to do after I get off work or school. I am not talking the lovey-dovey stuff like” I will rub your toes” but more like “I will kiss you till your toes curl” a bad nasty faithful guy will never miss out on the cookie if you know what I mean.
So I left the other blanks for all you gorgeous lily women to fill and tell us more in the comments about the kind of men you want. He may just be reading!!